Hey there,
So it’s an extremely popular topic for most of teenagers
eventually.
Not just teenagers, in fact, even your own family relatives
on you. It’s been a normal thing to actually go to several parties as well as
occasions to only be questioned with this :-
“ Hey, so have you
had a boyfriend yet?”
“I know you already
have a partner right? Inform us about him okay?”
“When’s the wedding
you’ll be planning?”
I’d say again, it’s normal to be questioned and bombed with
these things.
And yes, even when
you’re 18 –not 23.
People nowadays have this perception that the female
population has indeed increased drastically compared to male. In short, it’s
hard to find guys that’ll be interested in you when you are in need of
relationships (by means, reached at a certain age of availability for marriage)
cause’ basically they are all taken.
They have this enclosure that you, females better accept the
guy if he shows interest in you or you’ll regret for the rest of your life.
Why? They provide you with this reason.
Girls population are so many. There’s a chance you
won’t get married.
They’ll tell you to forget the rules of reputation. They’ll
tell you to not consider the characteristics of the guy interest. They’ll tell
you to just give in to the guy that easily. They’ll tell you to keep the person
firmly.
They’ll tell you to
lower down your dignity.
Excuse me, what?
I’ll say this straightly (I wish those who tell me those
things would read this one day)
If you really love yourself, would you want to drink poison?
Even if you don’t admire yourself well obviously you wouldn’t take the
challenge to drink poison too anyway.
Assume you’ve planned your life to be well done and perfect –but
of course must be needing a lot of faith as well as acceptance as God knows
best, would you want it to get spoiled because you got messed up with the wrong
person?
Would you accept the drop dead handsome guy who you've met in college that starts flirting with you and showing signs of interest without a sense of respect?
They even mention you shouldn't care guys regardless of religion. I swore I chocked.
Let me tell you a thing about soulmates.
I, believe that everything you do in life, it comes with
efforts. Without efforts you can’t achieve a specific thing or success in life.
I am always the type of person who thinks nothing comes about without efforts.
Nothing.
I used to get doubts on the fact that Islam itself mentions
that our true soulmate will come at the time that is suitable and written down
in the book of life.
Or even when people say ‘kalau
ada jodoh, insya-Allah kahwin’. (If fated, with God’s will we’ll get
married), I was once always like, ‘if!?’ how can you say ‘if?’ what the-
everything needs effort! You can’t say ‘if’!?
My cousin ended his 6-year long term relationship cause’ his
ex-girlfriend dumped him for another good-looking
guy. She was the sweetest girl I have met and yet, fate brought this way. A
family relative got herself asking her mother to find her a husband cause’ her
Arab boyfriend wasn’t serious on asking for her hand. Yet, had called her
parents to get back together with her but she refused. Fate brought this way. A
student had gotten ready for the wedding reception to only then know her future
husband didn’t want her anymore last minute. Fate brought her this way.
Even simpler, have you ever asked yourself how you ended
your relationship with your ex-partners?
It’s just a feeling that suddenly
comes and says you’re not meant for each other. You try hard, you do loads of
stuff to impress them or vice versa, but they or you just don’t feel the same
way anymore.
Everything is fated, you know. No, not everything. You can
change your life with efforts but like it or not, you should understand the
concept of soulmate and death.
What about these two? Try hard to get them to stick with you,
if they’re not meant for you they won’t be yours permanently. Get medications
and several surgeries to stay alive, if you’re fated to die on the next day
then you can’t do anything about it anyway.
You can make efforts for those you love as well as
maintaining your health in hope of a longer term life span. But different with
other cases, these are unchangeable.
So be it, go and let your partners expose themselves with
people around them and let them wonder if it’s still you they want. Give them
less attention and see if they either don’t mind about it. Go have many differ
gender friends and ask yourself if you might fall for any of them.
Girls, we are naturally loyal. Maybe due to the sense of
being lazy to find a partner or just in need of serious relationship. It’s hard
to open yourself to a total stranger and let them understand you.
Getting a new relationship? Sure, wait for another 5 months
to let the guy know yourself, all over again. We’re sick of the same routine
all over again.
But when you interact with your ex, you’ll suddenly
understand people were never meant to hurt each other in the first place. It’s
not much a choice if they cheated on you or you falling for another. It just,
happens, just like that. And you realize they always had loved you a lot but
fate brings separation.
They’re just not yours.
The person who broke your heart, talks to you and still asks
how your doing cause you’re the ones who used to brighten up their days. I can’t
even hate them till today really.
Besides your ex, it’s basically also valid for the partner
you’re having right now. If they are meant for you, go on meet other people and
let the other do the same, if you’re meant for each other, you both don’t need
much of an effort to keep it going.
You don’t need to make such efforts –but of course you need
to. I meant efforts by the meaning of desperation. You don’t force people to
love you. You don’t force people to be with you. You don’t force yourself on
anything at all. It’s a two-sided interaction commitment here.
No matter how you always seem to care for them, always wants
to let them know you’re fine with their flaws or etc, you just have to believe
if they’re for you, they’ll be there even when you don’t expect them to.
You don’t need to worry about them being with other differ
genders, worry about not contacting them, worry about either they still love
you. It’s okay to wonder, but if the other significant doesn’t think that way,
why be so desperate?
If those who are still single, why worry about it too? I
know and understand if you say they’ll come at the right time but have you ever
asked yourself when on earth will you be ready? Haha I don’t even know but
literally it’s when you just have that feeling ready for letting a person be
your other half.
Don’t lose your dignity just because you are afraid no one
will want you. Don’t feel afraid when
people scare you for not having a partner. Don’t be too much hard on yourself
thinking how to maintain the relationship you are now in. Don’t be so worried.
If it’s meant for you, it’ll be yours.
Love is really a wonderful feeling when you find the right
one for you. Being in love is such a booster for your days as well as an
ignition to your life. But remember that we should never have much
expectations. It’ll only blind you and shred you to pieces.
No matter what people say to you, always be yourself and
love yourself first. Then they’ll come to you J
Goodnight.
